Hi. I’m a 15 yr old girl, can anyone help? My story, sorry it’s so long, I tried to paraphrase it as best I could. Everything started my first year of high school. In 8th grade, a boy in my class attempted to rape me, but despite failing; I entered highschool very withdrawn and jumpy. I didn’t take care of myself and I was never mentally there during class, so naturally I was bullied. Band, the class I had loved for so long had become hell on earth- the senior and junior leaders of the section quickly became frusterated with me and began talking about me behind my back. Yay, here’s the fun part of the story. A junior girl, “Colleen” began talking to me…at first, she seemed kind, nice, everything, and I was so relieved and happy to have a friend. We grew closer. As so I began noticing things. Colleen would be talking and laughing with the section leaders and glancing over at me when she thought I wasn’t looking. I started feeling ill. I had bared my soul to this girl. I had told her about my life, from the most stupid things like my favorite ice cream to the attempted rape and how I think I might be a lesbian and have a crush on one of the girl section leaders. This is where things started getting really confusing. Colleen gave me a note telling me she had a crush on me, after taunting me that she’d tell the section leader I liked her, and saying if I didn’t be her friend (jokingly) that she would kill me and bury me in a land plot across the road. I was very scared and confused by this point. I didn’t know what to do with the note, so, I hid it in my closet and told her I only wanted to be friends. We talked less even as she started messaging me online more and more frequently. I tried to ignore her, but she became very upset and rehashed the same threats, so I chatted with her when she forced me to just so she wouldn’t tell my crush. A month or so later, my mother found it. She was disgusted (everyone in my family was raised as a hardcore Catholic). “Colleen’s a LESBIAN? Are you a LESBIAN? I CAN’T believe this!” I tried to tell her no, to lie, to do anything…this was never a way I had wanted to co! me out.  I cut off communication with Colleen. Skip forward a year to the present day, and I’m back in band, with Colleen being a senior. She texted me a week ago saying she would tell the entire section I was gay if I didn’t be her friend again. I know she’s already told her friends and possibly the girl I had a silly crush on. I don’t know what to do anymore. I can barely look at myself in the mirror. It seems like my sexuality has become a horrible, ugly thing, and every time I think about it, hear about normal people with boyfriends and girlfriends, hear Colleen giggle with the section leaders I want to curl in the corner and never wake up.  Can anyone relate? Is there anything I can do? I’m so lost and afraid.