Lesbian Question and Answer Archive

So… I come from a traditional Asian family and my family is 100000000000000% anti-gay. I know I am a lesbian for some time now and never even dare to come out of the closet (and probably never will, until my parents both die). My current plan is to just marry any guy who wants to marry me and have a couple kids, live a “normal” life.  Recently, a guy is asking me out. Suspecting that I might be homoflexible, I agreed to go on a date. He held my hand… ZERO feeling. I don’t know if he isn’t the right man or I am simply just 100% lesbian.  I touched hands with a girl (don’t think the dirty way… she just somehow liked to clap my hand with hers in a friendly way) back when I was in grade 9 (I am 22 now, almost done university), I had these tinkering feeling… So… What should I do now? Should I continue to date the guy and try to see if it works out? Wait for another guy to fall into the “I will marry you but I secretly won’t love you” trap? Or remain single at all time and just cry myself to sleep until my parents die? Remember… Coming out is not really an option until 40 years later.

One Comment

  1. Val Jan 1, 2013 at 19:01

    If it is not physically or financially safe for you to come out then you shoud not, especially to your parents whom you may be dependent on for the necessities of life. Forty years is a long time and you are still very young. I wouldn’t put so much pressure on yourself to get married if it is not in your heart. Give yourself time to see which way your heart goes.

    Reply

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