Justin

I thank you for your question. It is a pleasure to hear from you again.

A paraphilia is an intense sexual arousal from atypical and often times socially unacceptable stimuli. An almost endless number of paraphilias exist. A few examples of paraphilias are: erotophonophilia, an intense sexual arousal from killing someone; somnophilia, an intense sexual arousal from gently awakening sleeping people; formicophilia, an intense sexual arousal from being crawled upon or bitten by insects; and pedophilia, an intense sexual arousal from prepubescent children. Paraphiliacs can be of any sexual orientation and gender identity. You are a paraphiliac who happens to be a bisexual, cisgendered (identifying with the gender matching your biologically assigned sex) male. Your paraphilia manifests itself in the form of acrotomophilia, which is an intense sexual arousal from other people’s disability. Like paraphiliacs, acrotomophiles can be of any sexual orientation and gender identity. You are an acrotomophile who happens to be a bisexual, cisgendered male. Your acrotomophilia has you fixated on one very specific form of disability in other people: amputated limbs.

Acrotomophilia does not always rise to the level of being a diagnosable mental disorder, and I am incapable of making a proper diagnosis of your mental status given the circumstances of our encounter. The experiencing of distress and the hurting of oneself or others are elements of a diagnosable mental disorder caused by acrotomophilia. You are currently experiencing distress in the form of anxiety; but, thankfully, you are not hurting yourself or others at this time. If an acrotomophile is going to hurt someone, he will typically do so either by persuading a physically non-disabled person to voluntarily amputate a limb (through the means of mutilation by another, self-mutilation, or elective surgery) or by physically, verbally, or emotionally abusing a vulnerable amputee. As an acrotomophile, you have a special obligation never to use your acrotomophilia as an excuse to engage in any such unethical and/or criminal behavior.

I lovingly suggest that you consult with your healthcare practitioner regarding possible treatments of your anxiety and a further determination of the root causes and severity of the issues you are bravely confronting. You have no need to feel ashamed about anything you are experiencing. The challenges before you only mean that you are human – just like the rest of us. There, but for the grace of God, go we.

I wish you fair winds and following seas.