I’m a 30 year old gay man and I’ve NEVER been able to get or maintain an erection with anyone present. On my own with my fantasies or porn I can get myself hard almost instantly, but bring in a real person and all libido flies through the window, and because if this – I’ve never enjoyed sex!  I’ve not had sex in 4 or 5 years – and been single for 7. The last time was a complete disaster – and so was the time before etc etc, I enjoy the thought of sex great – but the reality is always uncomfortable, I also don’t like the other sensations of sex such as receptive anal sex (I love seeing it in porn but not doing it myself) . I’ve been in Long term relationships – and even with that built trust I’ve still not managed to enjoy sex! Its got to the point now that even thinking about someone being intimate with me makes me anxious, and therefore I avoid dating situations where it might happen – HOWEVER what I most want is to start dating again – and find that special someone, and with that person I want to have a good sexual relationship, but right now I don’t see that as possible. I think I’m certainly inhibited due to my upbringing (sex is an embarrassing thing/ we do not talk of/guilt) as well as having low self esteem and confidence, I’m terrified of failure and rejection – so I simply don’t try! I’m highly embarrassed to tell the doctors and I think being a young(ish) gay man they won’t take me seriously. I also tend to fantasize about strange and very specific fetishes (nothing disgusting) – which I actually DON’T want – as their not something I want to bring to the table of a relationship.