Okay, I’ll start off with my age and his age.I am 18 and he is 24, a little weird isn’t it? Well I have been best friends with him for 3 years before I started dating him(met him through my close friends).As of now , we have 15 happy months together (never argued or mad at each other). First of all his voice is extremely high pitch to the point where of anyone were to meet him they will assume he is gay. I have mentioned this to him a few months ago and said he had to idea why his voice sounds “high pitched”. Another one is that he has many lesbian friends and gay friends (I don’t even think he has more than 2 straight guy friends). He seems childish, doesn’t go clubbing, doesn’t go to college,never drank alcohol,or done drugs He is obsessed with anything Disney and works at Disneyland; many gay people work there.However this guy is is extremely sweet, caring, loving, mature, understanding, and always truly listens to anything I tell him.All those kind traits made me fall for him in the first place. He has told me he loves me many times,calls me everyday, and makes the effort to hang out at least once a week.I have asked my closest friends and family members what they think of him and they say he does have characteristics of a gay man but that they think he truly does like me. We have never had sex partially because I am young and I don’t want to but we have engaged in intimacy. Not often those this happen but when it does it mostly seems like I am in charge(maybe because Ive been in a relationship where Ive done countless sexual activities). My bf does seem to be very turned on when we do sexual things but the few times i gave him a hand job he didn’t seem to have an erection (like 3-5inches, perhaps his penis is small?) I would assume that if i am obviously turned on and on top of him he would easily he turned on? Anyhow although I am young I swear I really really do like him. Do you think he is gay and in denial? What is the nicest way to bring this up to him? Also I have met his all of his family and has said things like I want you forever and your everything Ive ever wanted.
Val
You should definitely have a talk with him. That would would be the only way to truly know what he is feeling. It sounds like you two are close enough that the conversation would not be an uncomfortable one. If he does have gay or bi tendencies you may be the only one he feels safe and comfortable enough to confide his feelings with. A best friend or confidant is usually one of the first persons that a coming out or questioning person shares their feelings with. Also, you should always abide by your gut feelings and if you have questions, then you have the right to ask him. You two are best friends and you are in a relationship together and there should be no secrets between you two. I would just find a time and place that is non confronting and neither of you feel rushed. Let him know how you are feeling and wait for his response. I don't think he will have a negative response as he does have gay and lesbian friends and he sounds comfortable with the topic. You should accept whatever response he gives you(straight, bi, gay, questioning, in denial) and not push the subject unless he is open to further dialogue. But you will have some answers that you can then base your future decisions on. I'm not sure I would label him as gay, bi, or in denial. Nowadays there are plenty of straight and comfortable guys who have gay and lesbian friends and fit the description you describe.
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