AMW

can so relate to this share because this is EXACTLY how my first girlfriend and I started our love affair.

You story reads as if he feels the same way you do. The tension will build and build till you both kiss and find common ground.

The mention of girls and wanting sex with them sounds to me like a cover up. One of you is waiting for the other to make a move. So scary and beautiful this situation. Go slow. Be brave. And just plain ask. Good luck.

Val

Thanks for the question. I think it is a special relationship that you two have that you can be so comfortable with each of yourselves to be open enough to express your friendship with touch. I have a straight friend whom I oblige with an emergency neck or foot rub, and there is absolutely no romantic interests with either of us towards the other. It would be great if more men and women were comfortable with their sexuality to be o.k. with a friends touch, but I guess that's why our views of sexuality are were they are today.

You're emotional well-being should be your first priority. You must prepare yourself to the fact that if he is interested in pursuing girls either now or eventually, you will only be able to maintain your friendship if you continue to be supportive of his decisions. Always focus on yourself to be the best person that you can be, both internally and externally. A confident external image is always more appealing than a clingy one. If you're feelings have grown stronger for him and you suspect the same, then you should talk to him. Just prepare yourself for any answer. He may be straight and comfortable or curious, Bi, not ready to come out, or he may be relieved and a relationship will blossom. Just be prepared and always live your life in truth. Good luck.

Justin

"ARE WE REALLY HAPPY WITH / THIS LONELY GAME WE PLAY / LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT WORDS TO SAY / SEARCHING BUT NOT FINDING / UNDERSTANDING ANYWAY / WE'RE LOST IN THIS MASQUERADE." - LEON RUSSELL

You are lost in a masquerade, for you have presented yourself as someone you are not. Your true self is hidden behind a mask of heterosexuality that you opted to don from the onset of your relationship instead of presenting your true face. It is no wonder that you feel as though you are being ripped apart by a relationship that you once naively thought would make you feel loved. The mask you wear has condemned you to the terrible fate of always having to wonder if the warm embraces, sweet words, infectious humor, and precious time offered to you by a young gentleman who is the object of your desire are truly meant for you or if they are meant for the person he only thinks you are. You will never know as long as you continue the masquerade that has caused your ongoing agita. That masquerade has failed to create a satisfying and meaningful relationship. The only thing it has managed to spawn is a fantasy constructed of pure fairy dust.

The antidote you seek is the truth. Drop the mask you currently wear, and reveal your true identity. Tell the gallant swain of your dreams that you are gay and that you are in love with him. Only then can he choose to love you. You cannot force him to love you; he must choose to love you. I cannot predict what his response to the truth will be, but he is entitled to to the truth. Tell it to him now; and from this day forward, always live in your truth.

I thank you for your question. It has illuminated the truth that being loved for someone you are not is of no value to anyone. I’m certain that our readers will appreciate being reminded of that important lesson.

I wish you fair winds and following seas.