Hi, I really enjoy this site, it’s one of the best sites that I’ve ever seen for the GLBT Groups. I’ve came out to be gay last summer when I met this guy online. We continued a relationship by long distance til last January due to him becoming straight. After a while, I’ve known this gay guy in my class (I’m in high school by the way) I finally came out to him because he felt ashamed to be who he is and I secretly was comfortable to be gay. We became close and talked on the phone. After all those months of knowing him, I always thought he was cute… I did like him a bit, but not enough… You see… He’s feminine and I’m… a little feminine but I’m masculine as well. I am aware that labels in feminine and masculine traits don’t exist in gay individuals, but there’s no other way to explain how we are… He is the one who wants to be taken care of, to be held, and… to be the “bottom” of the relationship. I felt the same way. Until he admitted to me he had feelings for me… all this time. And that he felt “drawn” towards me… He really has so much feelings for me… I… do too, but I didn’t “feel” that I’d be the best for him. So I rejected him a bit… Later on, I figured out that I did like him, so I told him and he was happy… One weekend, he came to my house and we made out in my car… in my room… and other places. I told him… (which is hurtful) that I didn’t feel much at the first make out… or kiss… But after a couple of days… I started to like him more. A few days later, he questioned to himself if he was really gay… I told him he probably can be bisexual… I was so devastated because I can’t date a bisexual guy… I have this resentment that they’ll turn to women over me. Like my last “relationship” (Not sure if I could consider it, due to the long distance and the unknown between us two) So… my feelings became “still” and we got through it… I waited for a while and finally asked him out. I really have those feelings for him, I do like him, and I’ve learned that I like taking care of guys that are more born with the feminine “traits” and “role” of the relationship, it relaxes me a bit more… I’m changing and I’m liking him more each day, but one issue… when we kiss… there are no sparks. Sometimes I get a butterfly here and there if we kiss, but… the rest, it doesn’t come up as much. I have no plan to break up with him, I like him with all my of heart… I’m just scared if this relationship won’t bloom as far… It has been two weeks. I know that seems a bit short, but I’m still a little scared that my feelings aren’t as strong as he feels for me. I’m aware that he takes it too fast, while we make out, he wants me to “satisfy” him in some ways, (no sex). I do get excited… I do get into it a bit, but first… I want intimacy with kissing and getting to know him. But he likes to have pleasure due to his hormones. (I guess he’s still going through puberty at the age of 18… I’m the same age as him). I care for him so much, I like him, whenever I’m not with him, I think of him… and want to see him, miss him, and much more. But the kisses… when I hug him, there is no “magical” bond yet… Maybe for him, but I can’t feel it at the moment. PERHAPS it’s due to me being closeted and him being out. I’m too paranoid to show my feelings around… (if in public, like in the car at the park). I’m confident with my sexuality, I have to say, but I want to be secret due to my parents not knowing… They’re homophobic and I’m not sure if they’ll accept fully of who I am. Anyway… the general question here is… What should I do? Is my relationship going too fast? When two individuals kiss.. do they always get the spark? I’m scared that I may not like him as much, which I do in many ways, but… the intimacy needs to have some magic… That’s all I’m worried about. I do apologize for my long jabber, I’m just a little concerned with myself about my feelings for him. Please… What do you think? Thank you.